Bloodsucking Fiends

So last Monday, the girls and I (er... and Nate, our straight guy buddy we bring along just for kicks) went out to the bookstore.

Hey, we're cool. Don't hate.

When we were there, we played one of my favorite bookstore games: Guess What This Book is About Based Solely On the Title. My teammate and I won easily. Our strategy was simple. Whatever the title was, we guessed that the book was about vampires.

And, more often than not, we were right.

We did have an unfair advantage, though-- we were playing in the youth section.

This makes me wonder-- what's the deal with all the vampire books? What's so sexy about vampires? Maybe it's just me, but if something's going to try to drink my blood, I'm not going to hang around long enough to know if his skin sparkles (no, I haven't read Twilight, but if the phenomenon continues, I'll probably have to).

But, seriously, let's look at this. There are so many books about people who date or fall in love with vampires. Someone has to have considered the pros and cons of it. Here are some that I can think of.

They won't ever have garlic breath, so I guess that's a plus. They'll just have breath that reeks of dried blood. Mm... tasty.
No lunch dates. Ever.
They'll be pale. But so am I, so I can't really say too much about that.
If you're ever really going to see them, you'll have to work nights. Or not work at all, which means you'll be broke. Unless you're going to let your vampire be the bread winner. Which strikes me as a kinda dumb idea, seeing as how they tend to not be too sociable.

I don't know. I'm really not seeing the appeal. Honestly, I generally don't even like the vampire books and movies-- they're way to melodramatic.

Except for the ones by Christopher Moore. I really recommend people who aren't so into the vampire trend pick up those.

I guess whatever the draw is, I'll just have to put up with all of these teenage girls drooling over creatures of the night until the next fad comes along.

The only thing that worries me is that there's no telling what the next fad could be. I might find myself thinking fondly of the vampire days.